Let There Be Light | Julie

I grew up in a Christian home. We went to church together, worshiped, and prayed together. I gave my life to the Lord and was filled with the Spirit as a child. My parents held on to some chains from the past, and eventually their marriage fell apart. My mother left us when I was just coming into adolescence. Here is where I began to wander away from the Lord.

    For the next 13-14 years of my life, darkness hovered over me. I lost track of God’s love for me and I lived with a pit of emptiness inside, so deep that I couldn’t even identify it was there. I was consumed with finding something to fill me… peers, partying, alcohol, drugs, my appearance, status, and boys. I was happy on the surface and I thought that was enough to keep me happy in my heart. My 20’s continued with drinking, drugs, men/relationships, and wandering….moving or traveling to different places where no one knew me. I almost wanted to feel unknown at this point of my life. On the other hand, I used a social/partying life to mask my loneliness. 

    During this time, however, I never denied Christ’s existence. Even though I did not follow God, I knew I always believed in Him. Because of the way I was brought up, my foundation, I prayed often, and new it was He who could sustain me through hard times, brokenness, depression, and eventually even the deaths of my parents. I met Kevin in my late 20’s. We fell in love but lived a life of impurity together. But by God’s grace, He called us to Him—together! We found a church and had love and life and Jesus poured into us by a senior congregation of rugged Montana ranchers and truckers. We began to grow together and pray together. I began to come back to the Lord, Kevin gave his life to Christ, and God blessed us richly. He blessed us with growth, with understanding, and with fiery hearts for Him. He blessed us with a family and security in Him. He broke our chains of the past and as we learned to trust God, Kevin and I prayed together as a couple and repented out loud of our past sins, God healed us and restored us. God is continually teaching us obedience, trust, and laying out His faithfulness and love before us. Last year I was baptized in front of my husband, four kiddos, and my beloved church family! God is good!